seeing off...

so here it is... the brink of another new year... i just realised that i don't feel older on my birthday... i feel older on NYE... damn... i realised that i haven't been able to let a year pass without doing something mainly because... well... i start feeling older... as silly as it may seems... the truth is... no one gets any younger... 2005 has been a good year... got certain things sorted out... i think i met my resolution spare... well... you know what... istanbul was great... 'balik kampung' was as always... a much needed breather... never fails to get me into a state of 'i don't want to come back to sg'... hahaha... hmmm... school was fine... i got into the course i wanted... and i can safely say that i made the right choice... my new classmates... well... you can't win everything... both rayas were fine... just wish it can be so much better... on a personal level... i am with someone who is the joy of my life now... and yes... i am very well taken care off.... thank you... spiritually... i think i am... well... stagnant... nowhere near where i am supposed to be but i can't say that i am a hopeless case either... most likely only slightly better than last year... financially in dire starits... ie.broke most of the time but hopefully i can get that sorted out with the arrival of some things... heh... mentally... well... i lost that some time ago... hahaha... family wise... well... i think we are closing the year on a nice note... and i think bobok has got somthing to do with that... that's why he is spoilt rotten... hahaha... yes... i have a cat now... yes... after 23 years... most of it spent giving up... techincally it is not mine... it is my brother's but heck... all right... i think i have got to make a move now... i am supposed to be somewhere else really soon... heh heh... nothing too elaborate though... just a simpole outing to see off 2005... so yes... till next time... here is to hopeful 2006... good health and god bless... cheers!

ah yes...

ok... so i am back as a civillian... heck... i've been back since thursday... just that i have been too damn bloody lazy to update my blog... time primarily spent catching up on lost sleep...
i know some people have been very, very busy while i was away and i told myself that i will address the issue when i get back but since the moment has passed... i think i shall let sleeping dogs lie... i think i can relate the whys... and i don't think that it is appropriate to air out such grieviances here... but please know that i am aware and that my apparent ignorance is only out of courtesy and respect to you as an individual as i know what is like... you are probably not going hear from me but please... i would rather not get there...
so how was reservist? well... it was tiring... definitely... alot of waiting... but on the whole... i think it went along just fine... taken positively, it is generally fun and interesting... people relations are much better this time round... i guess most are much wiser from past ICT (ie.PA) and have learnt to avoid behaving in certain ways... i know i did... heh... maintain beb... maintain... plus it would just be silly to get so worked up during an 18-day stint... so i guess we played it cool...
my troop was fine... we were definitely quieter (by not that much as we had our moments of madness too) than other troops but i think we carried ourselves professionally and we watched out for each other... there was the obvious nonsense and jibing... i wasn't spared myself... but it was all done in good humour with no malicious intent...
so yah... managed to squeeze out $400 in incentives out of the government... so i cannot say it hasn't been financially rewarding (whatever the amount)... spare my fucked up SAR (again for the third time...)... basket... quite disheartening i tell you... not demotivating, not frustrating... but a little disheartening... but nevermind... it won't change anything... i will still give my best if not for myself... than for the country (macam real...)... actually... come to think of it... it is more for the people around me since i keep watching out for others... but it is not a course for regret as i do find pleasure in helping others... just don't climb all over me and all will be fine... i'll skip the part on allegiances... but i think i did fine in that department in 18 days... heh heh... see how lah... see how... nonetheless, i would like to thank those who watched out for me during the 18 days... you know who you are and my gratitude is... as always... eternal...
took a bunch of pictures and whole tape of footage... don't know if i will actually do anything with them considering that the sound on the video is acting up... urgh... must find video head cleaner! heh... i don't know if i should put up any pictures here since i might get into trouble if i put up the wrong pictures and i am having difficulty choosing which i can put up...



somehow i think that this is a safe choice... it's got everyone and it doesn't show anything too incriminating or suggestive... heh heh heh...
don't ask me to list down who is who because granted that i can do such a thing, i don't really know everyone in my troop by name... i know their faces but i don't know their names... some i know but nicknames but don't ask me what their real names are... but yeah... above is my troop... i think everyone is there plus my command element minus one (the one who wrote my SAR...)... nice bunch of people... nice bunch...
so yah... moving on... on the brink of another new year... sigh... there goes another one... it's not a real sigh actually as 2005 has been a reasonably good year for me... very tiring but generally good... spare one ugly event right smack in the middle of it... you know who you are... but really... i do not have major issues with 2005... was watching some tsunami memorial thingy just now... lump in my throat... never fails to shut me up... i still spare a thought for those affected every now and then... hopefully we can see through these next few days of 2005 in relative peace and disaster (natural or otherwise) free... god willing...
ok then... that is it for now... will update again in due time... somehow at the rate i am going... it will be some time... heh... no promises but i will try to get in something before the new year is here...

going... going... gone...

it has been a while hasn't it? well... it is as such that when i am not occupied, i have been too lazy to blog... but a summary of sorts would be... school holidays starts, busy with raya stuff... then it was raya proper... then i was busy with some work which involves carving brick walls out of styrofoam... quite a painfully done but done nonetheless... then i went to malaysia for raya/wedding... very nice trip indeed... love that place... i intend to retire there some day... came back... got some work to do... namely a programme list for some event... it was quite nice... will put it up on the zilch website.... do check it out here... but the irritating (in no actual adverse manner) was that the event didn't really go as to how it was written on the programme list... not my fault but it does kind of make me look bad if one was to really think about it... then i i got a week of rest with nothing much to do spare a few occassions here and there... have to say i had a nice time at emma's chalet... so now... at 4.05am, i am burning mp3s into cd-rws so that i can take them to camp... yes... my bags are packed and in less than 4 hours time, i will be off for my reservist training... don't want to reveal too much or else i will get into trouble with the government for realeasing sensitive information... hahaha... so yah... there goes 18 days of december... hopefully it will go on just fine without much trouble, politics and all the other shit which i can't really think of at the moment... ah heck... while i am at it... i hope it rains so much during these 18 days that training is cancelled and i have nothing to do... urgh... i am so made just for normal duties... not these kind of specialized units... all right... till whenever... as a parting shot... here's something...